they need to just BURY HIM!
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
