So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would one night stand the shit outta him
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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