it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
