Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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