You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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