the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize