get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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