Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
