You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
of course. lets lasso hookers.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
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