He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
