so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
