I cockslap morals
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize