we're chasing vodka with high fives
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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