Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
are you so shy because you have an std?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
