Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize