it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Randomize
