But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
