oh god the rape fog is back!
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
