last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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