Whod you bang
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
