Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Bang-toberfest begins!!
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I need to calm my uterus...
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
