gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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