i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Let's get the cat blown out
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize