I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
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