Acid is not a monday night drug
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
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