God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
