why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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