Sry I called you an 8
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Randomize
