The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
