is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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