I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
