please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
