just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I think im going to throw up on grandma
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize