Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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