whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
She announced her abortion via fbk
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
