Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
