To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
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