that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
