Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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