awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
