Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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