My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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