She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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