Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
well most of my day revolves around power hour
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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