I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Randomize
