real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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