I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
