You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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