He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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