why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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