Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
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he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
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She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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