he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
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I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I have tasted many bathrooms
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.